35 Teachers Share the Sometimes Funny, Sometimes Painful Things They’ve Done out of Pure Exhaustion

I found a stick of butter in my purse when I got to school.

This time last year, I asked my readers how tired they were. They did not disappoint. I laughed, I gasped, I shouted “NO!” out loud alone by myself. I knew almost immediately that this question would be a yearly tradition.

So this year, at the same point in the school at which teacher exhaustion is at its peak, I asked again for teachers to finish the following sentence:

I’m so tired that I ______.

Here’s what they had to say this year. I’ve organized it for you by category.

School is hard 

“Went to blow a kiss to my teacher neighbor BFF as I walked past her door, but instead couldn’t focus and blew one while making awkward eye contact with the teenage boy standing next to her.” —Megan

“I’m so tired that I called my teaching partner Chris three times in the space of an hour. Her name is Britt. I’ve worked with her for three years.” —Mikell

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“Started driving to the school I taught at for 11 years. I haven’t worked there since June.” —Jenn

“This morning a colleague and I were BOTH so tired we panicked when our weekly meeting disappeared from the schedule. We called a supervisor to find out what happened. It’s scheduled for tomorrow, like it has been, every week since the first week of school.” —CJ

“I have transferred ’email Kelly’ onto every to do list for the last five weeks because I can’t remember who Kelly is or what I should tell her.” —Liz

“I was VERY close to yelling at a boy who I thought had a vape in his mouth. Turns out it was a Kit Kat. #givemeabreak”  —Gaby

“I told a parent ‘love you, bye’ at the end of a phone conversation 😳” —Marcie

“Tried to mute a student using the smartboard remote.” —Diana

“Emailed the parents about how cold it will be on Friday for field day… except I was looking at the weather for DC. I live in Houston.” —Meg

“I have to tell the custodian where I parked my car in the morning so he can remind me where it is when I leave at the end of the day.” —Maureen

“Called a kid Karen. Of all of the 150 kids I teach a year and the 6 years I’ve been teaching, I’ve never even taught a Karen…” —Kate

“Told my 1st grade class to BYOB, instead of MYOB (mind your own business).” —Laura

“I asked a student to, ‘Please recycle this for me.’ It was a Chromebook…” —Stephie

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Words are hard

“Forgot the word for ‘newspaper’ and referred to it as a ‘daily magazine.'” —Sarah

“Couldn’t think of the book title Hidden Figures and referred to it as ‘Space Ladies.'” —Kristina

“Sent an email with the word ‘premenstrual’ instead of ‘premature’ in regards to a job offer.” —Lisa

“Called a bandage a blood catcher. Student: I have a paper cut. Me: do you need a blood catcher?” —Marci

“Called the baby gate ‘the kitchen fence.'” —Sarah

“Referred to coffee this morning as ‘the waking juice’ because I couldn’t seem to remember what it was called.” —Mendi

“Told the cashier that I was not worried about the meat un-colding. He responded ‘thawing?’ I teach ELA.” —Shelley

Actually, everything is hard

“I’m so tired that I tried to write something down using my fork from lunch.” —Emily

“Placed an actual bookmark inside the cover of my e-reader to hold my place when I finished reading for the evening.” —Tashia

“Drove home to my mom’s house on autopilot. Haven’t lived there for a decade.” —Cassandra

“Put my baby’s shoes on the wrong feet and didn’t realize until he fell down about 14 times.” —Megan

“Tried to unlock my dog with my key fob.” —Emily

***note: another reader followed up and asked whether she’d meant “car.” Nope. She meant dog.

“Made chicken in my Instant Pot without the pot. Now my Instant Pot is broken.” —Hannah

“I tried to order coffee from a garbage can at the drive thru.” —Christina

“Put my fabric softener in the fridge and my almond milk in the laundry room.” —Lacey

“It took me an hour to figure out how to order pizza online.” —Amanda

“Tapped a word in a printed book, repeatedly, to find out the definition.” —Leah

“A prong broke off my black plastic fork into my salad and I spent a few minutes trying to figure out what ingredient of the salad is so pointy.” —Em

“Put cat food in my coffee maker.” —Madison

“I was so tired I found a stick of butter in my purse when I got to school one morning.” —Holly

And ladies and gentlemen, the MVP for 2018:

“Texted a parent that I was bored at work today when I meant to text my husband.” —Kelly

If you want to read more teachers being tired—especially some particularly hilarious comments that weren’t quite “school appropriate” enough for this article—check out my original thread here.

Oh, teachers. I’m so thankful for you and the work you do that makes all of us so dang crazy.

Check out “There’s No Tired Like Teacher Tired” here.